moms and views

reponse to bianca's blog post

Sometimes I think that moms really hurt their children when it is once reveal to them, at a young age what the mom thinks.

Here, it mentions how Mother is ecstatic to have a 'real' family, hinting that Mother did not believe she once had a 'real family' before; she herself was probably abused in her childhood which caused a child abuse chain effect.

When I was about 10 my mom told me she wished she didn’t have children. That made me so sad. On top of all the bullying at schoo, everything became so overwhelming. I never felt like I was allowed to cry or share my feelings because it would be selfish. To all the other people who suffer worse, from abuse physically. I was never really sure how to deal with it, so I bottled it up. But now that I’m older I find myself get depressed often and never has it gotten better by holding it in.

My relief is always my forms of artistic style. A lot of art makes me happy, the same with music. Music is my life and part of my spirit. It’s a part of who I am. And I chose that I would never let someone talk it from me. Often my mom has tried to take my music from me, but I can sing my own songs so I don’t need an iPod to help me.

My mom has a lot of problems, and has been through a lot. Sometimes I think she tries to put that same stuff on me. That makes me sadder but we can’t help but to move on. Even though sometimes I feel like I dislike her, I don’t hate her. It’s just moms can be frustrating.
Being a mom is probably a much harder job than it seems. When we were all little, everyone thought heir parents were super heroes with riches and riches. But now today things are much different, time changes our views of them. We go from I love you to I hate you but even if I say mean stuff about my mom I do care about her

last book response to unwind

For our last class discussion we talked about
- Unwinds and memories of their parts
- The riot and why they deserve to be told they should be unwound
- And how unwinding reminds me of the holocaust
If a person receives memories from their organ that came from an unwind then why get them. I think that if they spent more time working on surgery techniques and not going back to medieval ages with chopping up people then maybe they’d get somewhere. I find it dumb that they can see that they keep killing people who are young the human race can possibly go extinct, because it is killing the offspring of other people. Why should others get to choose who lives and dies?

The riot made me angry. The ungrateful brats deserved to be told that they should be unwound, however not unwound. They are so busy thinking about how someone could be a killer that they forgot that admiral was the one who set up the whole thing. House from house they could have been killed in the houses before the graveyard, but he didn’t have that intention. I thought it was rather obvious that the whole thing was just a rumor but kids fall for rumors so easily that it’s truly sad.

Unwind reminds me of the holocaust. During the holocaust it was the killing of Jewish and other minorities. In unwind it is genocide of teens, its genocide because it’s the government who is in control of it. We don’t know who the Hitler is but there are a few differences. Concentration camps were realistic they looked murderous. Unwind camps was an illusion, everything looked happy but in reality it was just a sugar coated concentration camp with staff that told you u weren’t really going to die. I’m not sure which would be worse.

To me it could be a chain reaction because things could start off today with abortion, its legal. Then they could say “I can’t handle these kids” and just as easily kill us. Before I thought that abortion should be legalized because it’s a choice but peoples choices are not the way to go. If the world was based off the choices of regular people then the world would be more corrupt than it already is.

response to rokhsor's blog: "we should forgive but never forget."

this is a response to one of rokhsor's blog post

My version of a famous quote goes like this, "You lie to me once, shame on you. You lie to me twice, shame on me." The quote means that once someone lies to you, shame on them because it was an act of stupidity on their part. If they lie to you another time, shame on you. The second part is "shame on me" because that would mean you would have forgiven who ever it was again and as I said before, they repeated themeselves. The whole point of this blog post is to talk about liars and people telling you all the wrong things. So here I go.

i think that she has an interesting view on this quote because i have heard it too, many times. i also have fallen for things more than once. one thing i do know is that the point of the quote is not to make you hate people who hurt you ONCE. the point of the quote is to warn you not the let them again. that being said, it becomes all about trust. unfortunately there is no real answer to a reason of why you should forgive someone, but not forgiving is the fastest way to learning how to hate. it is also a good way to gain a temper. i always thought that criminals were the worst thing ever and they should all burn die and go to hell, but when it all boils down to it everyone makes the same mistake twice, and it isn't always easy to forgive someone.

i'm not really a therapist or a smart kid but i have learned from the quote "forgive and forget" to forgive but never forget.

we are better than the people that put us down, because we don't put them down, there is no need. if someone talks about me, i do not start drama. i don't talk shit back, i leave them be. those type of people will never be happy. there was no reason to bring up the person that you did, so why start rumors and drama. its a cry for attention, and if someone wants the attention then they can have it. they can be forgiven after saying nasty stuff about me, but i will not forget and i will always take that into consideration.

i don't think by any means rokhsor is wrong for thinking how she does, but this is my own individual opinion.

Stop

some people never realize how much it hurts when they say things.
do you really honestly think they wont here you.
one way or another being the victim always hurts
but talking about someone else is easy to do without thinking
some people say mean things that hurt
some people cant stop and have to
those are the type of people who should Stop.

think with your mind
live with your heart
love with your soul
and the love that you give others will be returned.

there are people at asti who arent my friends, but i try to be nice because being mean doesnt help

name calling doesnt help.

class separation doesnt matter.

get rid of the old 8th grade, on the school bus stereotypes
leave. it . in .middle. school.

i knwo im not perfect and we have all talked about someone, but o regret it and try not to.

CD #2 UNWIND i cant believe this is the second time i did this late, im just gunna die /depressed

For the second discussion on unwind, we talked about the same things, Except the Lev issue. Lev is a you boy who has way more time then Connor and Risa to have to survive. We felt bad for Lev because he has no way of making it until we find out that he is sent to the graveyard too. Still then I feel as though Lev may be at risk of danger. I think Roland is going to try and do something to Lev, or turn Lev against Connor and Risa.
The scene in the book that was most entertaining was when Roland followed Risa into the restroom, of course risa was pissed at Connor for not interfering but it was the right thing to do. If he had attacked Roland then he would have gotten kicked out.
I think that Roland’s strategy is similar to Hitler. It is done not by attack but by smarts. He plays dumb until people figure out that he isn’t. I find it sad that he doesn’t have anything better to do with his time.
Once more we talked about donating and unwinding. My table mates and I all agree that donning is better than killing a person for an organ, but we also realized that it was also to kill off the teen population. There is a huge fault in that because our teens are tomorrow’s adults and their government could just go back to donning. Why should anyone have to be killed to get a kidney or a lung when everyone has two and can live with one of necessary?
This book overall is really good, I am totally engaged, there is everything from romance to action packed in one book. It makes me excited to read it, but I guess that’s a good thing. Our lit circle discussion when well, everyone contributed evenly and there was a great amount of participation but I think we got done to early. The reason I think that is because when we were done covering the points we needed to we talked about irrelevant stuff and the discussion didn’t last for the full time.

unwind review first to CD( i am such a -insert inappropiate words here- cuz this is late and its the end of my life...)

In our class discussion a lot of things came up, but the major thing that came up was other alternatives instead of unwinding people. When someone is sent to be unwound their parents sign them off to someone else, both Jessie and Devin thought that those things are extremely cruel. So the 3 of us talked about ways to get organs for the dying without killing teenagers to get them. We said since people die fast than people are born we could just use the dead peoples organs instead of making more dead people just to get one or two organs. One of the things that I meant to mention but did was how this unwinding reminds me of the holocaust because it’s the government’s systematic killing of teenagers. There are MANY differences from the holocaust and being unwound but it made me think of genocide in a way.
I also brought up Lev, Devin said that they should have left Lev to die because he almost got them caught but I couldn’t help but feel bad for the kid. People with religion are raised their whole lives believing things from people they are told to trust. When some random strange comes and snatches you from your father’s car even if he’s saving your life, he was thinking I’m supposed to die. I would understand because I have been told things and once corrected I didn’t believe the correction until someone I knew and trusted finally told me the truth like pastor Dan did with Lev.
We had questions and comments about how Connor was pretty stupid when he left his phone on. Devin and Jessie had to clarify because originally I thought that the truck driver ratted him out or was a cop the whole time, but they said that the truck driver was arrested and the cop got into the truck. I think that Connors fail was naive and another move like that at any time in the book would ruin his and Risa’s escape. I was also confused about where Risa came from but Jessie informed me that she was an orphan and so my questions were cleared up and overall I think the discussion was reasonably productive and successful.

BOOK Review.: bye bye kite runner

Title: Kite Runner
Author: Khaled Hosseini
Genre: Fiction, Historical, Drama.
Subject: Afghanistan
Kite runner is a tale of toy boys who grow up in Kabul and share the bond of brotherhood. When a situation that devastated them both occurs they are both uprooted from their home and separated by time race, guilt, lies, death, and war. The war that plagues there beautiful Afghani city.
Amir and Hassan play together all the time, but Amir never treats Hassan quite the same, this is why. Baba plays a major role in Amir's issues because he doesn’t support Amir in the things he loves. Amir takes on the feeling that Baba hates him because his mom died giving birth to him. Baba treats Hassan like a real son, even thought it isn’t established to Amir that Hassan is Baba’ son too. He feels left out, even thought he has more than Hassan he lacks one thing, his father’s approval. On top of his father being ashamed of him, he is also ashamed of himself for not being able to be like Hassan. He is actually jealous of Hassan, he has two dads, but when we think about it in a sense of compassion and unconditional love, Amir doesn’t have that. After Hassan was sexually assaulted Amir gets even more depressed at his inability to be brave like Hassan. After Amir moves to California things seem dry for him. I think he misses Kabul. He was only a kid so I feel as though he wouldn’t be able to get over leaving for a while and he also wouldn’t be able to get over Hassan being hurt until he learned to face his fears.

Amir was always a person who considered a person of high standing to be stronger, so he easily gave in, feeling inferior to them. He also felt superior over Hassan, but Hassan knew that and never took it to heart or hated him for it. Hassan was at peace with himself in a way. He knew that he had to give Amir the respect that he’d want Amir to give him. He treated Amir how he would want to be treated, even though in return Amir stood by letting Hassan fight for him, even in this instance, “Hassan shrugged. To an outsider, he didn’t look scared, but Hassan’s face was my earliest memory.” He knew Hassan was scared and had little defense, but he dared not stand up for himself.

I think that Amir becomes brave when he goes back to Afghanistan to save Hassan’s son. He sees so many things that he missed out on because he was lucky. “I don’t know if I gave Assef a good fight…I had never so much as thrown a punch in my entire life”. This quote shows him changing from I don’t know if I fought good but the matter becomes less about him and more about protecting Sohrab In a way living in America taught him that defiance is okay when it’s defying someone who is corrupt. Assef was the person who forced him to stand up, not for himself but for Sohrab his brother’s son. Whilst confronting Assef the only thing he thought about was Sohrab, Hassan, and how he couldn’t let Sohrab be an orphan any longer, how he couldn’t let Soroya become a widow, and how Hassan took the pain for him a long time ago. Thus giving him enough courage to not die in vain, to fight back.

Hassan is a much different character in this story. When Hassan was a child Amir and him were fed from the same person, the lived together from birth but a major thing that set Hassan apart from Amir is that Hassan enjoyed the innocence of his youth for as long as he could. He was always kind and considerate. That is because he was cared for by his Ali. Ali must have put morals and lessons into Hassan so that he would grow older and stay kind and pure hearted.
Hassan was a real friend to Amir; he protected him from Assef when he tried to hurt him. And the second time Hassan paid a price for being such a loyal friend to a coward. Yet Hassan knew Amir was there, he never was angry at him for not stopping Assef. Never blamed Amir, the guilt Amir felt was his own not someone else making him feel guilty. He always thought highly of Amir because he wasn’t as educated as Amir, and didn’t write like Amir either. Hassan didn’t need to know that he and Amir were brothers; he already treated Amir as if he were an older brother with respect and submission. If Amir had let time take its course and not blame himself so often for the incident then their relationship would have healed, but Amir would have remained cowardice. In reality, Amir trying forget and eventually forgetting his past for a while, guilt of witnessing and not helping Hassan when he was being raped, and Baba never telling Amir and Hassan that they were brothers due to his own pride was what made the two unable to meet again. It made them unable to reconnect, apologize, and bond.

Unfortunately they never made up because these two characters would have healed old wounds and start new. This would give Amir a chance to say sorry, to hug Hassan, to tell him that he was in fact his only friend. Once Hassan died and Amir found out I’m sure there was no reason he would have been as devastated as he was. I’d be sad to if I treated someone like a turd and found out later that he was my brother. Eventually Hassan and his wife encounter a tragic death but Hassan didn’t know he would be shot. I’m sure it would have meant the world to Hassan to know that Amir traveled so far to save his son, even if he wasn’t alive, his soul would be able to rest in peace.

final kite runner :(

This week’s reading for kite runner was the last section. I was pretty pissed off at the ending because I felt unsatisfied; it was like a lukewarm solution. I honestly wished for a happily ever after but this isn’t really this type of book. Thought out the book I was able to see that almost all of the characters are dynamic. Hassan even thought he died lived happily after the traumatic event that changed his life, in some ways for the better. Hassan may have never escaped Kabul and found his wife and had Sohrab if he hadn’t left from Amir.

I think Amir changed the most of all the characters. It starts as him being this jealous, bully-type, careless boy, then when he witnesses Hassan being raped, it completely changes his attitude. Amir isn’t able to forgive himself, but he gets the chance to atone for not sticking up for Hassan. I don’t think he went to save Sohrab because he was feeling guilty. I believe that he did it for himself, and for Sohrab’s sake.

Sohrab is just like Hassan in so many ways but he is a little quiet. And this disappoints Soroya. I understand why he’s quiet; he was sexually abused and not cared for. His parents were killed and he had been taken from his home land. A lot of things that go on in the book were cruel and frightening. I was glad thought that at the end Sohrab at least smiles a little. Ironically Amir ends up getting his lip split right in half just like a harelip, it made me realize that in the end he adopted an attitude like Hassan and stood up, fearful of being hurt but less concerned about himself. I was in a way proud that Amir improved because he learned that Hassan was his blood too he no longer saw a reason there should be a difference. He overcame his fearfulness and forever changed and saved Sohrab’s life for the better.

With a bonus some one BEASTED ASSEFS ASS. YAYUH!

Positive Deviant

A positive deviant in the passage meant straying away from the norm, the systematic dry lifestyles in professional work. In a student’s case it means being different in a way that makes a bigger impact, to get the grades but to act differently from the rest in a positive way.
I plan to use each of Dr. Gawunde‘s suggestions for being a positive deviant in high school and college. Using the first suggestion “unscripted questions” will come in handy. Being one to always ask questions makes this suggestion easier to follow. I find it easier to get along with teachers, students, and other peers and adults if you first get to know them. I like getting to know my classmates and teachers and I plan to continue doing that and when I become a psychiatrist I would like still apply this suggestion.

The next suggestion is something I learned in elementary school. Complains is a pet peeve along with excuses, to teachers. I don’t complain or I try not to because usually when I have it has gotten me nowhere, complaining is senseless because everything is the way it is for a reason. For the future instead of complaining I will be “doing”. If I don’t like something and I can do something about it why complain right? “Just do it” as Nike says. It seems as though complaining makes everything worse compelling a person to complain about the result they got from complaining. I definitely will not be complaining much!

When I first read the 3rd suggestion I didn’t really understand it, but I went back a read it again and then I caught on. When he said count something that something could be anything. Finding myself counting many things, I have counted how many times I’ve moved. How many years it will take the average person to get a PhD, I’ve even gotten to do Fermi questions and count something of great numerical value. Counting is fun. In high school and college I will be counting my teachers, my A’s (hopefully there will be lots of them to count), my days in school and out.

The 4th suggestion is already being applied. I love to write, I write poetry and stories. Even when I have to write an expository or persuasive paper I enjoy it. And writing not only applies to free write or class writing but I even want to start using a planner and writing what I have to do and will be using a planner from here until I don’t have to use it anymore. I’ll write for leisurely purposes and for productive times such as jobs and school and many other things. Writing helps me keep organized.

Change on of the most feared things for a lot of people, but not for me. I often change my appearance, my goals, and my dreams. Even moving from Illinois to California for the second time is change. Although change can take a turn for the worst, going to ASTI will be the best change in my life. Now and later on in life I will try to always be positive and open to change, because without change a system or team of people may always be flawed. And if people don’t change they tend to find themselves stuck. The 5ht suggestion is the one I can relate to most. Change to me is everything because without change in my life I wouldn’t have gotten to enjoy the feeling of success.

Response to 2nd reading of kite runner

This week’s reading for kite runner was very sad and depressing. The span of pages reveals the death of important characters Baba, general Taheri, Hassan, and Hassan’s wife.
BABA: Baba’s life was short lived because he suffered from cancer. I think it could have been from smoking and stress too. It really sucks that Baba didn’t tell Amir that Hassan was his brother but I think that he was too guilty and too proud. Knowing that Hassan was Baba’s son explained why Hassan got treated more like a son than Amir. I remember saying “Baba acts like Hassan is his son.” Well I was completely correct! I think over all he died happy, Amir was married, he graduated and because a known book publisher. He also knew Hassan was doing well too, seeing as Rahim was giving phone calls and checking in with Baba.
General Taheri: his death was very sad, and it made me sad for Amir and Soraya.
HASSAN: I am glad Hassan got to live and have a kid and a wife which I think if Amir hadn’t framed him of stealing, if they didn’t leave, he wouldn’t have gotten a chance at that. So without knowing I think I was right that Amir had done the nicest thing he ever would for Hassan by setting him free of that home. Sadly Hassan couldn’t get rid of such a friendship, he wouldn’t, because he knew deep down that Amir only acted like an ass to him because he felt bad, and he knew. Amir did always say Hassan was the only one who really understood. It was proven too. Unfortunately Hassan and his wife were killed in a crisis, and a complex situation. I think that Hassan didn’t want his son to live the same life as him, which is why he didn’t back down from the Taliban, he didn’t let his son grow up as an illiterate, and he carried the same kindness his father Ali showed him down to his son, so that he wouldn’t be bitter and cowardice like Amir was because of Baba’s neglect and hypocrisy.
I can’t wait to see what Amir will do once meeting the son of his brother and I can’t wait to see what Hassan’s son will do. I really hope Amir can move the guilt out of his heart and take in Hassan’s son as his own.

A witty respones to yazen's response to my post : Nothing Happens to Be Anything

We blame Bush, however i don't think only one man is responsible for what has been done.

Well Yazen i agree that people behind George bush, like people where behind Hitler, but it isn't true that we went in on terrorist threats. it maybe all you ever hear in the news, OH GREAT BIG SCARY PLACE WITH SCARY PEOPLE AND SCARY WEAPONS!

It seems like Oil happens to be what America wants, however the "cause" of going there in the begging was to stop a possible terrorist threat towards the people of both America and the other country's we claimed were in trouble.

i think not my friend. No the government wants to keep us confused, most people stopped caring because there are too many places to keep up with.
when it was stated that one of the OH SO SCARY PLACES had a powerful nuclear weapon, they send in our men and troops to stop this terrorist attack and then someone is like "cough cough no cough cough weapons cough cough oil".
it is NOT a coiencidence that we go to OPEC countries and fight. if we win the war, reparations will be made probably in oil, not in money. it'd give me a good laugh if that really happened. it seems as though i am crude toward our government but i am not stupid and nor is anyone else. if there isnt enough evidence of americas issues that the government tries to desprately cover up, walk outside, go to a car dealer ship and ask wheres the electric cars. Go to the airport and ask the manager how many electric planes do you have. Dont let people give you the half-assed excuse that we dont have the technology, that is a bunch of BS. Im pretty damn sure that we have the technology.

I say it's all a bunch of crap. Wiping out thousands of men, women, and children isn't a problem to any humans these days. It seems like Oil happens to be what America wants

Oil doesnt happen to be in the spots we fight, IT IS WHAT WE FIGHT FOR. OIL OVER LIVES. its what the people who really run america have come to, yeah its wrong but nothing happens by chance. After i wrote my essay i quickyly learned that we dont have enough oil in america to last us that long.

you can find his post on my post here

THE BEST POST EVER.

no.

NO NO NO KITE RUNNER NO NO NO WHAT THE HELL!?!?

WHAT THE HELL....WHAT THE HELL....OMFG WHAT THE HELL IS THAT.......NOOOOO -CRIES- DAMN EPIC NOVELS DAMN YOU ALL........-CRIES MORE- THIS IS SO EVIL, CONSUMING ME....THEN MAKING ME CRY.....IM SO ABUSED.....DOMESTIC VIOLENCE.......OMFG......! READ IT GUYS READ IT A CRY WITH KATHY ON MONDAY K......what the hell is this....omg im like ready to drop hecka eff bombs, MUST HOLD BAD ON SWEARING BUT JEEZ, I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS. IM MAAAADDD AND SAD AND MMAAAAAADDER

The Inside Of the Iraq War. Whats Really Going On? Why Did it Start? When Will it End?

The Ongoing Oil War

Oil: this is what America uses to power most of its machines and it is also what caused a war. After the prosperity of the 50’s and the civil rights conflicts of the 60’s, another problem struck the U.S. Hostility flared between America and Middle Eastern countries over decreasing the supply of oil . In October 1973 a shocking decision made by the Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries lead to chaos in the political and economical world, and shook up millions of lives in America, thus leading to today’s war between Iraq and America over the oil export limitations.

After WWII the Jewish wanted a place to go that was clean and holy, unlike Germany the place where 2/3 of their people’s population suffered massive genocide. They sought the “holy land” that was of extreme religious value to them, but they encountered a problem. The land was already owned, so by force the Jewish people with the help of America fought their way into Israel that was once Palestine. Egypt and Syria attacked Israel in attempt to gain back what was once Palestine, but America interfered, this made many nations angry especially the members of OPEC.

The OPEC’s oil embargo dated back to 1973, but the tension with OPEC and America goes back into the later 1960’s . In the 1960’s and early 1970’s when the Egyptians demanded their land back that was taken by Israelis in 1967. They tried to be subtle going about this situation, but the constant refusal meant war. The Egyptian leader had made a threat to start war with Israel if there was no agreement or backing down. Sudden attacks on Israel brought America to Israel’s aid. This action of generosity infuriated the Middle Eastern lands on the opposing side.

King Saud convinced OPEC to make a choice that still affects America today. They decided to put an embargo on oil going to America and the Netherlands. An embargo restricted both countries from receiving oil. This was a problem for America because it used the most oil out of all of the receiving countries. It causes a political uproar, but that’s exactly what OPEC wanted. Attention to the political world, they wanted people to worry, for not just the people concerned in the matter to feel the impact, but the whole U.S. to know that the members of OPEC where bubbling with anger toward America for supporting Israel in the Yom Kippur war.

Today the fight still remains but has shifted toward the territory where the oil lies, in Iraq. Iraq is one of the top oil producers in OPEC. So, America is trying to reach their oil, as if it is a competition. In the U.S. oil is very important and is used for mainly things such as planes, produce, machinery, and many others. It was recorded that 20,680,000 barrels were used in a day in America which is about 13,000,000 more than any other oil consumers . Oil is a profitable good and is extremely useful but the simplest attempt at a change in energy use, or even dependency could have brought us out of fighting many years ago. This fighting has caused enough casualties and even has had Americans held hostage in war. To prevent the further conflict alternative sources of dependant energy would solve many of our foreign oil conflicts.

124 kite runner discussion

8.

AMIR- Amir is the main character of the kite runner; he is his own antagonist at this point in the story. A big conflict arises when Amir doesn’t help Hassan in the alley when he was being sexually assaulted by Assef. This shows a lot about his character, Hassan was always kind to Amir so we ask why Amir didn’t protected Hassan like Hassan had protected him. This lies deep in Amir’s relationship with his father. Amir’s father__ was not good for him, didn’t encourage, show kindness, or cherish his son. So when Hassan did all of these things for no reason I think it true irked him internally. He wondered why Hassan doesn’t hate me, so often. Amir knew he was wrong but he was also jealous of Hassan because he was so pure and kind and his father and Amir’s father showed kindness to him. He was envious that Hassan didn’t envy him, Hassan felt complete with almost nothing. Amir stopped talking to Hassan after the incident in the alley because he was guilty and he knew it. Deep down he wanted to help but he felt hopeless and he cowered. He was glad it wasn’t him but he felt terrible for letting Hassan go through that. He didn’t act quick enough and he over thought the situation when he was witnessing it. Hassan hadn’t thought when he defended Amir from Assef the previous time, and for not standing up for Hassan, Amir became self hating it seems. He didn’t have the guts to face Hassan and be his friend because he felt like he didn’t deserve it, but he lied and said he didn’t know what happened to Hassan because he was too concerned over himself and his own punishment. If Amir was even a considerate person he would have helped. His character comes off kind to Rahim, loving to Baba, unengaged with Ali, selfish with Hassan, and hating toward himself. I was pretty sad when I read “that” part in the book and as of right now I’m viewing amir as a person who hasn’t made up his mind on what kind of person he will be, and it wasn’t stored in his heart by his father so I ultimately blame them both for amirs’s foolish thoughts

i love how i posted a HUGE assignment

i posted my reflective essay at 11:59:48

reflective essay

~Blogging has been a tough experience for me because of my poor time management, but if I used the quick writing method we use in class to improve my writing I think I would benefit from it.

8. I don’t like having a blog because I am not a consistent; it hasn’t really changed my writing much though. I have my ups and downs in everything, and that’s were blogging comes in. When I come home I do my math homework, then writing one, then science, then whatever else comes next. The problem with blogging for me is that I almost never have anything relevant to write, then I want to start a story, then I get scared that it will sound stupid and suck because I am just a poet and ONLY a poet. That really needs to change because I am not going to write a poem with 300 words, which would be insanely long. I think my middle school English teacher babied our class because we were not really required to have a word limit on essays or projects so it has become extremely hard to focus when I have a word count because even as I’m writing this I’m staring at the word count SO IT MAKES IT HARDER TO THINK WITH A GIANT 1000 WORD LIMIT!! It’s scary. If I didn’t have to write so much I think I would write about random things and not focus on one topic so it’s good for my writing habits but it’s BAD BAD BAD for my own little faults. So I have to fix myself? It would be good for me if I had a topic generator and think of the blog as a quick write and don’t stop writing until my 10 minutes are up which would be great for me who never has a legitimate or appropriate for my blog. I am not necessarily benefited from waiting to the last minute or treating blog post as if it is not an assignment which doesn’t help. If I changed my mind set blogger would be easier to work with.

My own question: how do quick writing ideas from in class help me make blog post?
Often my quick writes help me get my creativity, and mood right so I can focus on the writing. I think that if I used the quick writing method I would benefit from it. Things that help me most is the time limit, if I didn’t stop to spell check my writing every 3 minutes I don’t think I would be too distracted, If I kept writing without letting myself get distracted by my text messages, Facebook or just plain ol’ goofing off on the internet. I do realize for most it is a temptation that usually is not attempted to be resisted, but I know myself that if I’m on Facebook and trying to make a blog post I’d get distracted. The keep writing rule also helps because it usually leads to me writing in depth about the question, contemplating the topic of the prompt, it’s very hard to explain but you get into a vibe of writing and you fall into a mood of solitude and no one except you, the paper and pen just simply writing, everything is in sync and things are PERFECT for the mood of writing. When we quick writing in class we also have music, this idea I take advantage of because I have my own writing playlist with songs I don’t sing to but can set my mood of writing and determine how happy, depressing, or just random the post will actually be . Also the 3 minutes to plan rule is effective in class because it gives me a chance to brainstorm and determine what I’m going to write about. Altogether quick writing is very useful and even if I decide that my quick write when well I could always just type it out and tweak it to perfection and post

There are several goals that I need to focus on, one of them is procrastinating. I do it way to often and it’s a bad habit and it doesn’t just affect one class it affects all of them another goal I’d like to work on is making my writing sound more adult like in such ways as clarity and detail that my writing often lacks in certain ways.id like to become a better writer over all and not just be a good poetry writer. Even my middle school teacher said that my best subject is poetry when it comes to writing. It sometimes is like frustrating to write a paper and feel great about it then get it back with a mere C+ was a trying too hard or not trying enough. As far as my blog goes I haven’t really written anything relevant like this . I should like go to a topic generator and get topics because although I can make poetry write of the top of my head. My thoughts and ideas are much to free form to really put in writing often when I write I have to have silence but music. and the way the writing sounds reflects my mood which isn’t to great think there really is no actual way for me to be so consistent to where I can keep a blog so I may put my music on my blog so then that way I won’t have to be distracted. usually I just edit and remake old things like projects and essays from eight grade but I’d like to become a more independent writer because I really need to be able to think of ideas of the top of my head and I’m not very good at doing that. It really can be put simply as I’m not really into it. I’ve had many things like quizilla accounts and I never was very consistent so a personal goal to exercise in every aspect is to practice that.

Central Conflict "Of Mice and Men"

The Central conflict in Of Mice and Men is Lennie vs. society; he is a villain to himself and the insensitivity of the people around him doesn’t help him adjust to living normally. Also George, his only companion fuels the flames because he doesn’t particularly care to teach Lennie and help him understand, he just tells him things. All together the plot is wrapped around

Lennie does a great disservice to himself because he depends George tell him what to do. He cannot think for himself, and when he tries to he ends up doing something bad. “George make him stop” Lennie says. That is Lennie down playing himself, setting himself for failure by allowing others to tell him what to do. Yes he is mentally disabled but no he is not unable to use his head. He could be smart but he lets people take advantage of him, for his strength and sometimes for a good laugh.

Insensitivity is also what aids the conflict, lennie is obviously mentally ill, but no one pays him any mind. They don’t stop and have consideration because usually back then a person was wrong and outcast for having mental disabilities. “’Course he ain’t mean. But he gets in trouble alla time because he’s so god damn dumb”, this is a prime example of how people think that him having a disability is a horrible thing.

George is another reason why lennie is so messed up. Most friends give encouragement to their friends, and support them if they are ill in anyway. I doubt that George considers Lennie as a friend because he’s always saying things like “if I was a relative of yours id shoot myself” the irony in this that he was like a relative but he didn’t shoot himself he shot Lennie. If George meant well for lennie and wasn’t so selfish then he would have taught lennie to function. Instead he made his illness worse by taunting him and making fun.

Lennie doesn’t help himself out, and neither doesn’t anyone else. Reading of mice and men made me realize how horribly people treat people, particularly grown people, who are autistic or who have Down syndrome. Luckily for them they have more options then lennie did. He was not helping himself by being dependent, and George and no one else would ever truly treat him as a real person with feelings, that was this short novels main conflict.

of mice and men...

curly wife is a bimbo...

Ever since I was little I asked question after question. That may have been annoying then but If I hadn’t I would not be the young lady I am today. I love math and science however they aren’t my only passions. School is a big part of my life and I always enjoyed school because you get to learn, and not only that you get to learn with friends. I take my education pretty seriously, but I also have a saying “learning is great, but you also needing something fun to balance!” I believe that to be true. The only way you can truly be a great learner is if you also have something other than academics that you enjoy. I enjoy theater, music, dance, singing, and art. I like to believe I can do anything that I put my mind to and, with that mindset I will be great. I have a certain level of simplicity but, when I see that perfect project where I can use all my skills to make it the best I can’t help but get excited. With the attitude of a helper I’ve always wanted to become a doctor because doctors get to help people and engage in medical science, as well as get inside the human body to find cures and disease. I feel that my personality is pretty great I have potential, but that doesn’t mean I can’t improve. Who’s to say that I can’t change? I have changed in the last few months as far as my motivation, which has greatly increased, now that I’m getting toward the end of my last year in middle school.
My studying skills are one thing I can change for the better. I do study but not as much as I should to be the best and so there are times that I don’t want to study, but then I was glad I had studied because it can only help you. My learning skills are quite different though, because my thinking and teaching as a child up until now are different. I learn by repetition so if I repeat something so many times I will understand the concept of it. My parents always taught me the same thing over and over again just so I’d understand it. Whether it be science, math or maybe even language arts I always try to learn as much as I can. There is however a way to improve and that is to try things that are even more challenging and the questions that are the most complicated are the ones I should attack first.

My teachers always tell me I have potential which, in fact is a great complement but they also say my organization skills need to improve. I’ve been putting in more effort towards my work to make it the best it can be. My parents have helped me to be successful as well. They always made sure I had what I needed but never gave me anything I didn’t deserve including punishment. My friends also look out for me. Though I only have a few and the rest are acquaintances we all stick together, helping each other when we are down and making each other laugh. I love my community and the people in it. My town is clean and has a lot of volunteer workers, such as myself, to keep it that way!


My most important accomplishment is my school life in general. I couldn’t possibly be too specific with school. I’ve done many things at school, such as becoming a member of the national junior’s honors society. It was one of the biggest accomplishments of my life. There are also my extra-curricular activities like drama and choir and band. I’ve always been a musically involved person. I love music and acting. Even more than my passion for the arts I have passion for knowledge as well. I love to learn new things even when they are difficult. I have done many things to contribute to the school effort and learning. I often volunteered to help out after school or I’d be going to one of many contests for band or choir. Even when I’m putting on a power point presentation for a class I love to learn and I love the feeling of helping others do their best. My school life is considered a great achievement to me because I’ve never been bad at school and I’ve never gotten bad grades. I even have a wall of accomplishments in my office over my desk and most of the awards are school related. This is something I can be proud of because I can look back and say “wow look at all these accomplishments I’ve achieved in such a short time”. Not only that but I can truly be proud of myself because I am always focused on school no matter what. Also my record of accomplishments is long and worthy of mention because just on what I’ve done in middle school being an honors student for only this year, and still doing great in school is result of my motivation. I think it’s amazing that in only 8th grade most of my teachers have told me that I have an old spirit and that I’m very mature even though sometimes I disagree. I’m glad that my teachers who know me on a personal level can say that I’m not like any other middle school student and that I’m beyond my years in my actions. These are things that I take pride in because they are important to me.

PHOBIA PROJECT :D

phobias ~
Phobias affect many people, mostly in America. All fears have cause a trigger and a cure.

Define phobia?
Phobias are violent irrational fears that can be of many things, from bald people to Germans, that cause little to no harm. Scientist have studied phobias for a few decades, but they have yet to come up with a legitimate scientific reason as to why phobias occur.

Past connections?
All phobias are rooted from fear that wasn’t eased.
They usually develop in early childhood and can be learned by family members or can be caused by a bad experience. Habits developed as a child to calm fears can cause phobias by making the child believe if this tradition or habit isn't done that something bad will happen to them.

Symptoms
Symptoms include, uncontrollable anxiety, the need to get away, knowing you have a phobia, sweating, rapid heart beat, difficulty breathing, feeling of panic, and anxiety at the thought of the object.

Triggers
Fear is natrual to dangerous situations and usually has a trigger. Triggers are situations, people or objects that make you afraid. What can be a trigger exactly? The trigger can be a sight smell or sound that reminds you of that thing you fear. For example if someone has a phobia of fire and smells smoke the smoke would trigger fear and in this case the smoke serves as the trigger.

The circle of fear
Fear and phobia development has a process called the circle of fear.

1.something makes you worry
2. the body responds to this worry.
3. the body sets off other worries
4.worries about future and well being starts
5.Worries about body reactions worsen fears
6.increased fear causes fear of losing control
7.a fear of the fear develops
8. the cycle repeats itself

What phobias cause:
Phobias can cause anxiety disorders,they can change behavior to a point of being disruptive.
Can cause post traumatic stress disorder. A compulsion is feeling like you absolutely have to do something, and an obsession is a constant unwanted thought. OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) is caused by phobias but is uncommon in younger people with a phobia.
OCD can be a result of or cause a phobia. Phobias can cause substance abuse and social isolation. Men tend to mask their phobias with drinking. “8.7% of Americans have a phobia and are over the age of 18 although phobias appearing in childhood. ”Age groups 11-15 usually suffer from social phobia .

Treatment: coping skills
Coping skills are realistic solution that are used to deal with challenges and icky situations while having a phobia.It uses their past to heal them;Includes deep breathing exercises and imagination techniques.

Treatment: exposure
Exposure pushes a person with a fear to face that fear head on. People who go into exposure therapy in the early stages of an undeveloped phobia can stop it. A person in exposure therapy has to be willing to get rid of their phobia,The last most recent way to cure a phobia is by memory alteration. Scientist say you can stop a phobia by removing the memory of whatever traumatized the person. this process is completed in the 6 hour trauma stage The trauma stage is the 6 hour time period that the circle of fear cycles constantly. Scientist think they can remove that part of the memory before the phobia develops. The only problem is they cannot distinguish bad memory from good memory.

Who Are You Really

Sarah Winchester, a widow driven to insanity had a house like a maze, unsure where you’d end up next. The mansion in California said to be haunted was occupied with one woman and many ghost seeking revenge for their deaths indirectly caused by Oliver Winchester Sarah’s husband. He and Sarah’s daughter died suspiciously and perhaps she’d be the next. To trick the evil souls in her home she made her house into a puzzle, as is the mystery of the Winchester mansion.

Ghosts wander the halls of the Winchester mansion with only one thing on their minds, vengeance. The Winchester’s family before tragedy was known for rifles mainly used in the civil war, and people killed by that weapon sought revenge. Sarah, the wife of the Winchester family, suffered a great loss when her husband and nine day old daughter had passed away, but things took a turn for rock bottom when Sarah went to see a fortune teller.

“There is a curse which took the life of your husband and child... Ghosts roam the halls seeking vengeance because of the weapons created by the Winchesters family... You must flee and build a home for you and spirits who’ve fallen from this terrible weapon. You must never stop building or you will share the same fate and you husband and daughter. Keep building and you will live. Stop and you will die.” Sarah did as told and that’s when havoc spilled into Sarah’s life. She fled to San José, California where she found a 6 room house. It did not stay that way though once what the medium said caught up to her.

“For the next 36 years, they built and rebuilt, altered and changed and constructed and demolished one section of the house after another. She kept 22 carpenters at work, year around, 24 hours each day. The sounds of hammers and saws sounded throughout the day and night.” She built on so much because there where many traps she’d hoped would trick the evil spirits and make them leave. Mishap struck when the San Francisco earthquake of 1906 hit the mansion. Sarah thought of it as punishment for finishing off the front of her home. She boarded up the front so it was never to be finished. One rainy night after conversing with the spirits Sarah Winchester went to sleep. Permanently.

Was Sarah simply off her rocker or is there something, or even someone lurking in the dark halls of the Winchester mansion. There have been many reports of orbs seen floating threw rooms in the mansion. The house is very strange, endless it seems. Sarah was only a misfortunate widow caught in the wrong situation, shaken from loses she suffered, and cursed. even though Sarah seemed crazy there is the slightest chance that the Winchester mansion was indeed infested with chaotic revenge-thirsty so

Q is always so ashamed or so proud. like he's bipolar

Q often goes back and forth between prideful arrogance and shameful embarrassment. In the text Q exhibits prideful arrogance in several situation such as when he says: “ but we had nothing in common with them; on the contrary, our skin, smooth and slippery, was such as no fish ever had”. This shows that he thinks that land animals are more visually pleasing, than old fish. In several cases he obviously forgets where he comes from.

He shows shamefulness when he reflects on Lll’s family who seems to be some of the most civilized land creatures that existed at the time. “her relatives made me a bit ill at ease; hers was one of those families who had become established on earth in the earliest period and had finally become convinced they had never lived anywhere else.” This shows that he feels inferior to land creatures that were born on land, as if he was jealous. Obviously he is somewhat self concious

Lastly, he shows more arrogance when he is speaking with Lll about his uncle, when explaining that they would populate the world as land creatures he says “stop repeating that old fool’s nonsense. The world belongs to those with legs, not to fish, and you know it.” This shows again that he is being proud and discriminative to fish. He’s saying that land creatures are better and are the ones that deserve the world.

WELLTHEN

okay so this post will basically contain my experiences from back in chicago


Ode to the Lovely Dream
The dull gray life I live is so much more exciting with the non-real twist of my imagination. I wait the whole day just to sleep so I can have the perfect dream. Whether it is on the beach with an unimaginably attractive person, or throwing eggs at Canadian police with my best friend from Chicago, nothing is better than being in a dream. Life is wild, dangerous, and irreversible, it can’t be changed or simply imagined and every second the clock is ticking. In a dream time can stand so still, like a picture, that when u wake up you could have dreaming a life time full of all the things u desire most. Cruel is how the cold eyes of life look at me but in my dreams all the eyes that stare are warm and kind. Too bad we can’t imagine life of life would be a dream.

ode to the chicago species

The quiet fishy little town on the bay called alameda isn’t the worst place but certainly isn’t the best, but a little place with big dreams, strives on the lively people, Chicago. The leopard print heel clicks on the pavement, the sophisticated sips of Starbucks Cappuccino, sounds of the city transit and chattering of friends and black suite business men. Nothing can get a person excited like the huge shining reflective peanut, or the tall Willis Tower that everyone still calls the Sears Tower. Amongst all the wonderful sites the most breath taking place and most likely to catch an eye is the Buckingham Fountain with many bright lights in the mesmerizing evenings. The newest jazz player, guitarist or even pianist, fresh as baby’s breath, on some occasions stand at the corner to play with love for their beloved city, and also bit of spare change. Everyone seems to have that sense of fashion, the glamour, the beauty, what the top fashionistas call the “it” factor. At last though, my day dream is over and I am back to listening to the 6 year old kid next door crying obnoxiously loud for about 6 hours a day, as well as the smell of fish.Oh how the difference between alameda and Chicago.

my youtube video

:DD check us out skippin down the hallways rollin on the floor, so much fun

what did cheerleaders do GOSH

 I found this quote I want to expand on in Lhadze's blog.

 "their weaklings who are wimps without the cheerleading squad behind them"

it really makes me giggle inside my head to see being a cheerleader used a stereotype for a bully. at the same time it bothers me and id just like to point out that not all cheerleaders are the evilest people ever. alot of them are weird, like not even joking they are weird like enjoying putting baloney on their faces. My point in saying that is mainly a cheer squad might think its cute to imitate something like mean girls or what ever but media is making the stereo types even worse. I of all people know words hurt. I hurt people with my words sometimes and sometimes people hurt me.

these girls who are considered so evil aren't evil at all. its just america likes to take  a small group and generalize the whole town based off of one person they met there. we are all guilty of being judgmental. how could u possibly thing with out judging right. the difference is whether the judgement is prejudice or not. People say things sometimes that are mean, and make other people feel like the poop of the poop. while yeah its not nice and its mean and evil and blah blah blah, it's going to happen. its human nature to judge but it doesn't have to be human nature to be prejudice.

and now *drum roll* i will put in a poetry piece to go along with what i wrote

if i had a cat and he was fat i'd call him a lazy cat.
what if he wasnt lazy.
same with a person,
if i saw a person and called him fat
what if it was built in their genes to be that way
and of all the things we tend to say the ones that hurt most are the ones that are from the mouths of people who didnt know

if i had purple skin and weird eyes would that make me an alien. whos to say. why does it matter if im an alien. are you the alien police. i think not! GOSH

lol idk why i wrote that but i like it an it made me laugh

this weeks analysis

Sometimes you just gotta deal with it:

 This week has been the whiniest week of my life. I have need seen so much whining and I have never whined so much. I don't think that whining is a good think personally. I’m not really sure how to avoid whining or venting. It’s like word vomit, it just easy to say something. It just rolls right off of my tongue, but it’s venomous and it can be very offensive to other people. I’m not sure how to vent but therapy could be an option.

Maybe I should just go cry: 

Well I mean it’s not like I can’t cry, so why not? I think people should cry more. Without being a cry baby. I’m trying to avoid brain tumors 

Facebook you don’t want to know what's on my mind:

Don’t ever ask me what’s on my mind because I will lie. Not for the heck of it. But back to what I said, I talk about something; it comes out as word vomit. So what to do. Wing it, make something up. 

People on dumb stuff: 

Yeah everyone is tired of them but they never go away. I feel whiney right now. I want to sing, sing a song. I feel like writing a song 

realizing that its hard to get over hurt of someone close to you is hard and personally its hard for me to not vent. to those that i vent to please ignore me. ignorance is mans greatest weakness, and that i have known for a long time. i wish i could have applied it. oh well, im sorta just waiting around on my butt. is it because im bored no, is it because im depressed maybe of is it because i need to learn how to not act like a 60 year old woman. i mean really? who watches soap operas. no one... 

REBUTTAL: Death Penalty Con side

                          My opponents say that the death penalty will strengthen the economy and sets an example for the rest of the world. Instead of keeping criminals in jails for long periods of time, they should be executed in order to save America and its citizens money. Even though taxpayers pay for criminals to live in a prison, and cause problems for them, taxpayers are doing some good for the world. Taxpayers are not only paying for prisoners’ accommodations, but also their life. By saying that it is a waste of money to keep prisoners, my opponents are also saying that there is a money value on their life. A life is a life, and there are people that feel remorse when the stated “legally murders” them.
                          “With the death penalty the money left over can be used for education and other programs that are in debt. Some may argue that the death penalty is expensive, but a lethal injection isn’t the only way to serve justice, methods such as hanging or electrocution will do just fine.This may sound scary, but once the body scents the reality of death it goes numb so the criminal won't feel a thing, said by Time. But that wouldn’t matter since most feel no remorse anyway. Also, if the death penalty gets veto keeping inmates who commit unspeakable crimes in jail will destroy the economy. Gradually in time, crimes will come to a minimum and there will be no reason to have the death penalty.”
                              During the debate during class, my opponent stated that the death penalty is cheap, “Death penalty only costs two dollars.”
                             Hanging people may sound like an easy process, but in truth, it is not. When someone is hung, the organs in their body go toward their feet and their bones in their arms and legs also slide down toward the floor. The person being hung doesn’t stop feeling pain until their body weight pulls so hard on their neck that is snaps and at this point the body goes numb and the person drowns in their blood. “It may sound scary” is an under statment!

Quote on shannon richardson's reflection of "Guns, Germs, and Steel" by Jared Diamond

    "When arguing a point you need to be able to back yourself up with sound, logical, and solid evidence. If you don't use sound evidence people won't believe you and your point will not be heard and ignored"

i think that this quote from shannon's blog is totally legit. This brings us back to so many debates in classes, without the solid evidence needed accepting the concept of something maybe extremely difficult. In court usually if a lawyer doesn't have evidence of innocence with regards to their client then most likely they would lose the case. With parents on the other hand you prove them wrong and they are still right in their parental head mindset. What shannon said is a good way to think when defending yourself in a misunderstanding.

thats just screwy : rant on mcdonalds

okay so why would any one ever want mcdonalds? you do know a man in like arizona reached in his mcdonalds bag and turns out a scorpion MMMMAAAAAAGICALLLY appeared in his bag. hmmmmm thats just screwy

a BUM....called me a BUM....

i really wanted to put this to show you how UTTERLY RIDICULOUS people can be these days. 

so i was at lunch with 3 buddys and we were talking about money and as we walk by this old bum guy i say "i dont have ANY money." the old man walks up and says " you know what that makes you?... A BUUUUUUUMM"

is that stupid or epic or both... i vote both thank you.

Bullying is for SORE LOSERS!!

8/19/10, kathy ,

I used to have a best friend and we’d hang out with this group of girls with really nasty personalities and it made me sad so usually I would intervene in their bullying. I was like a fence hopper; I wasn’t sure what side to be on. My best friend however blended right in with them, leaving me alone to stand out. Soon enough I had become their target.

I could have immediately left their little group but I was scared that I’d be more awkward with everyone else because at the time I only had one friend, but soon I realized that she wasn’t my true friend and I stopped hanging out with her and the clan of dull minded girls. Instead I made friends with really smart honors kids. They were beneficial to me because they helped me with my work, and in return I helped them with their language arts and social studies work.

I think people bully for two major reasons, insecurity and being a victim of bullying by someone close to them. They feel like they have to take down a person who feels great or has a good time because “misery loves company”. They have to make themselves seem superior over others so that they can make others feel like they have to be nice and look up to them, wanting to put others don’t for their own self satisfaction.

obliteration is deserved, BUT ....CHANGE is way better!!