Final Reflective Essay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Year round we have been working on various topics and readings in English class, Going from debates to politics and wars to new opportunities and mind boggling symbolic books.
We have been given a reflective essay and I chose to write about my favorite blog post and its inner meaning.() It contains explanations of examples I gave in the blog post about the symbolism of windows in “the house on Mango Street”


Windows is my favorite post. I think this post because it was an assignment that gave hint to a window being a confinement in one way, but a light of hope in another way. I never saw a window as hopeful. It most likely depends on the mindset of the person. As a kid, I lived in the car, I have seen more hrs in a car than an average person will their whole lives. If I had homework, I’d just have to do it in the car. If I had a test the next day, even if it was 2am, it was “oh well sleep in the car”. You can guess how leisure time was treated if sleep and homework were put off for it. Never happened, in fact I bet if I had not started to overachieve in school I’m sure that I would see three places in a day. Home, Car, School. Everyday Home, Car, school (not in order). Yet at the same time I had no real right to complain because of all of the people dying everywhere sleep or no sleep, car or no car. However the windows in the car were the worst part. Car windows defeat the purpose of a Driving lover. The windows a lot you to see a second of something, a driving lover is obviously in the car for 2 reasons. Speed and comfort.
Speed is a reason because obviously if a person had a day to walk somewhere or horse carriage somewhere then they would, but it is quicker and more comfortable to drive. A car, though, is like a box trap, and windows are the sike out. When you look out at the windows onto a mountain, don’t you ever get the erge to touch the mountain, but you can’t. Or in my case, if you were a child and saw seconds of kids playing in a yard laughing and having fun, wouldn’t you want to go laugh play and have fun too. I did. I rarely got to. Instead I saw the same image through the window every time I looked out. I knew where I was so well just from looking out the window I could already tell where I was going. The bad thing about that is that, at this point the new scenes, the “I want that” feeling went away. After seeing it so often, I grew out of it as if I was experiencing it. Growing up for me happened fast as far as mature thinking goes. That is because I spend 12 years of the 15 riding around seeing other people live their lives. But I didn’t get to live mine. I got to sit in a car and look out the window wishing that I could just slow down. Be normal.

“ I can relate, I love to take pictures of nature but I’ve always ridden in a car so there was no way to take a great picture. I used to have to watch the kids play outside though my window while my childhood drifted away, I didn’t have very many friends and sadly no one really wanted to be my friend. So I sat there looking out the window, unsure whether I should go out into the bare coolness of a shallow friendship that has no real important. Or watch what it looks like to grow up being friends with only one person. Today I still look outside the car window, but I have my own camera to capture what I wish I could just step out of the car to see.”

I’m pretty sure when I wrote this I was thinking of exactly what I wrote and quoted. Feeling somewhat trapped because there was no way to avoid running into the situation. The women in the story were trapped because they were too beautiful and were held back by parents or husbands. That leads into another type of being trapped.

“These are just examples of women who are alone, depressed and feel as though they have no outlet.”

The insider on this statement is basic. I always feel to a certain extent trapped in my own thoughts giving no outlet. The only way to let things out for me was to sing, and then I got into drawing, then writing poems. However it doesn’t undo the confinement. Writing or not it still never changes the fact that someone Is lonely. I have my sister as an example as well. A pretty deep story she told me exhibited how trap she was as a teenager living with the world’s most pestering mom. She could never go anywhere because she had to babysit me. So she turned to drawing as her window. But as soon as she got more attached to me than her window, she never was able to escape until she left home. The drawing opportunity was no longer an option because she had to give it up. That was her dream, but her desire was to just enjoy her teen life. She didn’t really get to do much of that and spent it moving around looking for that magical outlet that she lost once she stopped drawing. Then her window became me. She spent so much time with me that I loved her just as much as I loved my mother. Yet her confinement continued. The petty punishments continued, and she endured it to her escape. My sister unlike the women I talked about in my post was able to get out of her trap but only by one way. She stopped staring out the window, got out of the chair, left out the door and went far away (college), Resuming her school career briefly. I took this horribly because she was like a mother to me and I love my sister so much that her pain is my pain. I feel a little like Esparanza because I have a way to get out. With 3 other siblings from my mother’s side to tell me what not to do, I pave my way into the to do’s.

I guess I do figure that everything is a way for a reason and my post was this way for those reasons. It is my favorite because It related most to what I said in the story and is the deepest one that I have written almost. My writing goals for the summer are to write and read at all. Most kids don’t do jack squat during the summer, especially writing so i want to be a little different and not forget how to "read big words" (LOL). I hope I’ll be able to check out 6 goooooood long books and just read my way out of the madness!

final draft of review

The title of my book is Impulse. It is one of 7 or 6 books by the same author with the same genre. The author is Ellen Hopkins, the genre of this book can go under romance, and drama. It has many tragedies. The subject of the book is abusive family relationships
Connor is the first main character introduced. He’s a ladies man, but his relationship with his parents absolutely sucks, due to their lack of emotional communication and care . Vanessa is the the second main character. She is what people would call emo, she cuts cuts cuts away, she and her mom don’t get along so well since her mom is nutty. And tony is the third main character. He is gay, or at least that’s what he says. His parents both neglected him his dad left him and his mom and his mom paid him no attention. Even when he cried out to her she bitterly shot down his reason for crying and blamed him. Any who all of them are brought together under one roof. The mental institution. Their relationships changed constantly as they weave in and out of drama with themselves, their parents, and others like them , and weirdo’s not so much like them.

-compare the book to a book by the same author
I’m reading impulse and I haven’t read identical. Crank and glass are centered on the drug, love, and sex life of the main character Kristina who has 3 children. In fallout her children go one with their lives similar to hers after her transition to bad girl. Burned was about another girl who was sent away from her Mormon household for assault to her aunt’s house. They are all very similar, the one I’m reading now is most like fallout. In impulse the kids are neglected by their parents, specifically their druggy or cruel mothers and walking out fathers.
Fallout is most like impulse of all of them because it also has a 3 person POV. This has 2 of one gender and 1 of another. The difference is fallout is a continuation of the lives of a druggie mother while impulse starts off with the whole drugs fixation. In fallout the 3 characters have problems like lies, drug use, sexual abuse, cheating, and illegal stuff or rebellion.
In impulse each character has their own problem which links together by a suicide attempt at all 3 of them. Tony had drug use problems and father problem; in the book often we question his sexuality because he has a liking for Vanessa. Vanessa was into self mutilation and has a schizophrenic mom. Conner had problems with dating an older woman and competing for Vanessa’s attention. Patterns in the book usually include: drug use, religion, sex, rebellion, and false illusions of love. Her books also don’t usually have 100% happy endings. In burned someone lost their child, in crack someone got raped, and in glass someone got sent to prison.
The major differences between fallout are that the three main characters in fallout are related to each other, doomed to walk in their mothers footsteps, fallout has 2 books before it to explain their mother that has a great effect on them, and they all are linkedand act similar.
In impulse the characters don’t act the same, they kids walk in their own footsteps, it is one of the series of books, and they all have their own individual problem
Extra own questions purpose, character relationship combo-

Purpose: I’m sure that Ellen Hopkins’s purpose was to give readers a taste of the hard and real life. With many twist and turns in each one of her books she takes strips of real lives, real stories and combines it with the main characters common misfortune that she/he usually suffers. Most of her books have characters that practice at some point self hate and become liars and players. But by the end of each book the problem they had at first is blown up or destroyed completely. I think what she does by doing this is creates a way to compare her characters. I have just started a new book by her thanks to Karen Chavez . And so far my point in the book is not very far in but there are already factors of secrets. Hate, love, sex, and bad parents. Somehow in each book she also manages to incorporate those things into the plot as well as drugs. It is a reasonable idea that Ellen Hopkins wrote these books to appeal to a more pessimistic crowd since very few things is this book are optimistic. As I have gone on farther than before I realized that these three characters are all linked together. In fallout they are more distant. This is important because then it’s easier to make the connection between them all.



In impulse for tony he hates his mom, dislikes his dad, and despises the man who raped him. For Vanessa she hates her mom to a certain extent and she hates herself for a point of time in the book. For Conner he hates a lot of people mainly his parents because they don’t care for him. His dad pretends to care and just only cares about grades, his mom only cares about the same with grades and all but also about sports and her expectations.

As far As love goes, tony loves Vanessa, Connor, and his closest friend Phillip. Vanessa and tony develop a special relationship. Vanessa thought she loved her ex boyfriend, but she didn’t. However she did start to fall for tony; however he and Conner also shared something special. Connor’s love situation was most complicated, didn’t love either of his parents and neither of them loved him. He was neglected so much that in the end of his challenge in mental camp he commits suicide after everyone receives their parent letter. His simply says we have standards; you follow them, get good grades and stay in shape. However his strange lust for older women was cause by the lack of care and compassion his mother showed him, and it causes him to commit suicide after he feels alone because Vanessa and tony have each other.

In the end the book shows how anything can effect someone’s feelings. And any small thing can push someone over the edge. However in Connors case it was no small thing, he felt unloved. All the people he wanted love from were unable to give it. It encourages everyone to be careful because you never know someone else’s situation

book response

The title of my book is Impulse. It is one of 7 or 6 books by the same author with the same genre. The author is Ellen Hopkins, the genre of this book can go under romance, and drama. It has many tragedies. The subject of the book is abusive family relationships

Connor is the first main character introduced. He’s a ladies man, but his relationship with his parents absolutely sucks, due to their lack of emotional communication and care . Vanessa is the the second main character. She is what people would call emo, she cuts cuts cuts away, she and her mom don’t get along so well since her mom is nutty. And tony is the third main character. He is gay, or at least that’s what he says. His parents both neglected him his dad left him and his mom and his mom paid him no attention. Even when he cried out to her she bitterly shot down his reason for crying and blamed him. Any who all of them are brought together under one roof. The mental institution. Their relationships changed constantly as they weave in and out of drama with themselves, their parents, and others like them , and weirdos not so much like them.

Ellen had all of them, I’m reading impulse and I haven’t read identical. Crank and glass are centered on the drug, love, and sex life of the main character Kristina who has 3 children. In fallout her children go one with their lives similar to hers after her transition to bad girl. Burned was about another girl who was sent away from her Mormon household for assault to her aunt’s house. They are all very similar, the one I’m reading now is most like fallout. In impulse the kids are neglected by their parents, specifically their druggy or cruel mothers and walking out fathers. The fallout is most like impulse of all of them because it also has a 3 person POV. This has 2 of one gender and 1 of another. The difference is fallout is a continuation of the lives of a druggie mother while impulse starts off with the whole drugs fixation. In fallout the 3 characters have problems like lies, drug use, sexual abuse, cheating, and illegal stuff or rebellion. In impulse each character has their own problem which links together by a suicide attempt at all 3 of them. Tony had drug use problems and father problem; in the book often we question his sexuality because he has a liking for Vanessa. Vanessa was into self mutilation and has a schizophrenic mom. Conner had problems with dating an older woman and competing for Vanessa’s attention. Patterns in the book usually include: drug use, religion, sex, rebellion, and false illusions of love. Her books also don’t usually have 100% happy endings. In burned someone lost their child, in crack someone got raped, and in glass someone got sent to prison. It is a reasonable idea that Ellen Hopkins wrote these books to appeal to a more pessimistic crowd since very few things is this book are optimistic. As I have gone on farther than before I realized that these three characters are all linked together. In fallout they are more distant. This is important because then it’s easier to make the connection between them all.

9. –purpose, character relationship combo-
Purpose: I’m sure that Ellen Hopkins’s purpose was to give readers a taste of the hard and real life. With many twist and turns in each one of her books she takes strips of real lives, real stories and combines it with the main characters common misfortune that she/he usually suffers. Most of her books have characters that practice at some point self hate and become liars and players. But by the end of each book the problem they had at first is blown up or destroyed completely. I think what she does by doing this is creates a way to compare her characters. I have just started a new book by her thanks to Karen Chavez . And so far my point in the book is not very far in but there are already factors of secrets. Hate, love, sex, and bad parents. Somehow in each book she also manages to incorporate those things into the plot as well as drugs.

In impulse for tony he hates his mom, dislikes his dad, and despises the man who raped him. For Vanessa she hates her mom to a certain extent and she hates herself for a point of time in the book. For Conner he hates a lot of people mainly his parents because they don’t care for him. His dad pretends to care and just only cares about grades, his mom only cares about the same with grades and all but also about sports and her expectations.

As far As love goes, tony loves Vanessa, Connor, and his closest friend Phillip. Vanessa and tony develop a special relationship. Vanessa thought she loved her ex boyfriend, but she didn’t. However she did start to fall for tony; however he and Conner also shared something special. Connor’s love situation was most complicated, didn’t love either of his parents and neither of them loved him. He was neglected so much that in the end of his challenge in mental camp he commits suicide after everyone receives their parent letter. His simply says we have standards; you follow them, get good grades and stay in shape. However his strange lust for older women was cause by the lack of care and compassion his mother showed him, and it causes him to commit suicide after he feels alone because Vanessa and tony have each other.

In the end the book shows how anything can effect someone’s feelings. And any small thing can push someone over the edge. However in Connors case it was no small thing, he felt unloved. All the people he wanted love from were unable to give it. It encourages everyone to be careful because you never know someone else’s situation

edited review.

Ellen Hopkins has written several books that I know of. There was crank, burned, glass, identical, fallout, and impulse. I have read all of them, I’m reading impulse and I haven’t read identical. Crank and glass are centered on the drug, love, and sex life of the main character Kristina who has 3 children. In fallout her children go one with their lives similar to hers after her transition to bad girl. Burned was about another girl who was sent away from her Mormon household for assault to her aunt’s house. They are all very similar, the one I’m reading now is most like fallout. In impulse the kids are neglected by their parents, specifically their druggy or cruel mothers and walking out fathers. The fallout is most like impulse of all of them because it also has a 3 person POV. This has 2 of one gender and 1 of another. The difference is fallout is a continuation of the lives of a druggie mother while impulse starts off with the whole drugs fixation. In fallout the 3 characters have problems like lies, drug use, sexual abuse, cheating, and illegal stuff or rebellion. In impulse each character has their own problem which links together by a suicide attempt at all 3 of them. Tony had drug use problems and father problem; in the book often we question his sexuality because he has a liking for Vanessa. Vanessa was into self mutilation and has a schizophrenic mom. Conner had problems with dating an older woman and competing for Vanessa’s attention. Patterns in the book usually include: drug use, religion, sex, rebellion, and false illusions of love. Her books also don’t usually have 100% happy endings. In burned someone lost their child, in crack someone got raped, and in glass someone got sent to prison. It is a reasonable idea that Ellen Hopkins wrote these books to appeal to a more pessimistic crowd since very few things is this book are optimistic. As I have gone on farther than before I realized that these three characters are all linked together. In fallout they are more distant. This is important because then it’s easier to make the connection between them all.

Purpose: I’m sure that Ellen Hopkins’s purpose was to give readers a taste of the hard and real life. With many twist and turns in each one of her books she takes strips of real lives, real stories and combines it with the main characters common misfortune that she/he usually suffers. Most of her books have characters that practice at some point self hate and become liars and players. But by the end of each book the problem they had at first is blown up of destroyed completely.

:DD

#6
Ellen Hopkins has written several books that I know of. There was crank burned glass identical fallout and impulse. I have read all of them, I’m reading impulse and I haven’t read identical. They are all very similar, the one I’m reading now is most like fallout. In impulse the kids are neglected by their parents, specifically fallout their druggy or cruel mothers and walking out fathers. The fallout is most like impulse of all of them because it also have a 3 person POV. This has 2 of one gender and 1 of another. The difference is fallout is a continuation of the lives of a druggie mother while impulse starts off with the whole drugs fixation. In fallout the 3 characters have problems like lies, drug use, sexual abuse, cheating, and illegal stuff or rebellion. In impulse each character has their own problem which links together by a suicide attempt at all 3 of them. Tony had drug use problems and father problems. Vanessa was into self mutilation and has a schizophrenic mom. Conner had problems with dating and love issues. Patterns in the book usually include: drug use, religion, sex, rebellion, and false illusions of love. Her books also don’t usually have 100% happy endings. In burned someone lost their child, in crack someone got raped, and in glass someone got sent to prison. It is a reasonable idea that Ellen Hopkins wrote these books to appeal to a more pessimistic crowd since very few things is this book are optimistic.

ourpose: I’m sure that Ellen Hopkins’s purpose was to give readers a taste of the hard and real life. With many twist and turns in each one of her books she takes strips of real lives, real stories and combines it with the main characters common misfortune that she/he usually suffers. Most of her books have characters who practice at some point self hate and become liars and players. But by the end of each book the problem they had at first is blown up of destroyed completely.

chap 8-9

1) The dialogue in the story isn’t bad. It seems as though the author had thought about the dialogue quite a bit. My suggestion for it would be to make the beginning a bit more interesting. Perhaps I say this because I haven’t read previous chapters but the girl characters’ relationships seem really boring or typical. I feel as though he could have also described the makeup scene more because smearing make up on may not be a bad thing or a good thing. I was looking for, does she look cute, ugly, weird? The beginning lacks detail that could change the mood coming into that chapter. In the end I think the dialogue was good but could be a bit more interesting
2) Adrian’s folklore is very cool. I thought it was pretty interesting but someone who doesn’t like mythical stuff wouldn’t necessarily look forward to reading such a long chapter about it .
3) Dorothy’s reactions are realistic but they aren’t descriptive enough. Show it not tell it is what we use at school and that aspect in this book could be the thing that makes it from an okay book to a great book. I want to know more about how she feels. The folklore and the description of Adrian needs to be applied to Dorothy as well. It would help spice up the writing and make the main character more interesting. She seems bland.
4) The cultural part of the story seemed a bit long but not quite forced. Just a bit unexpected as most cool guy people in the story wouldn’t usually talk about that kind of thing and may have been even a little more flirtatious.
5) Dorothy’s thoughts of how she feels about Adrian don’t clearly come across here. I think she is a bit boring, as most of the things that happen to her only her observation of it is given but not her thoughts or feelings about it. For example if a man saw a dime and observed it and came to the conclusion that it is shiney. (Well id want to know how does he feel about it, how does that affect his action? Does he pick it up?) so when Adrian does all of this stuff, I want to know how that makes her feel.
6) Adrian is okay, he isn’t very flirtatious which to me makes him just okay.

where esperanza will go from here

Esperanza has been saved from a dark future on Mango Street and because she was different from the other girls in some ways she was the one who made it though the book without many tragedies and painful scars, unlike sally, or Minerva. She was considered lucky. It was prophecy that she would be the one to escape the bad life that everyone else suffered particularly the woman suffer. The pregnancy, the abuse and unsuccessfulness that plagued Mango Street skipped over her. Yet she felt bad because of what happened to sally and the others as we could tell. This was evident when she had wished to escape then afterward thought “…I felt ashamed for having made such a selfish wish”(pg. 105). This particularly shows how the misfortune of women in Mango Street is a cycle that most women there go through, its as if they are entitled to it.

However her future unlike the others is bright. From reading in her prospective it is easy to tell she is very intelligent and observant. She may move on to have a great job. Since her view on men is probably pretty bad she may not get married or have children but she would defiantly support her family if they needed it. She may even end up influencing the young woman on ways to avoid getting beaten and harmed around Mango Street as she has managed to stay out of trouble herself. She could even become a role model for them. She is smart and she knows right from wrong for the most part. Her parents encouraged her as well to grow up and not quit school or anything but to keep enduring life so that she wouldn’t have to live the home life like the rest of them “Esperanza you go to school. Study hard,” (pg 91). So she could be the type of person who helps others in that situation. She is just the type to do it as well because she didn’t necessarily have all the money in the world all she had was her house on Mango Street her family and a few dear belongings. Over all her life would’ve been the hardest out of all of the women though because she will be the one to go out in the real world, past the hurt, past the ignored cries, and far, far past Mango Street.

this is how i am

I am a half lazy half “gosh I can do it myself lemme alone,” type of person. I am probably the only extremely talkative person who likes to be alone and quiet sometimes. I like to splat paint on a piece of thick paper and call it a masterpiece. I seem to be a spacey person to other people. Sometimes I go home and play my instrument for hours until my mouth is numb and sometimes I avoid looking at it. I have a very funny and weird family. I have 3brothers and 3 sisters and I am “aunty” to 13 members of my family. Both of my parents are tall. My dad likes to crack toilet jokes to my friends when they call me and he picks up before I do. I am very clumsy and I trip and fall a lot but I never manage to break anything. I have a lot of random impulses to say something sarcastic, and I smile too much. I used to eat paper, mechanical pencil graphite lead, and chew on my toys. When I was 3 I spilled scolding hot coffee on my left foot and got 2nd and 3rd degree burns.

I like classical music by Bach, Holst, Beethoven, Brahms, Mozart, Haydn, Schubert, Chopin, Debussy, Tchaikovsky, Dvorak, and Vivaldi, just to name a few. I’m moving soon! I’ve spent most of my childhood in a car going here going there, not very pleasant. My favorite TV show is house and my favorite movies are Donnie Darko, the hangover, and wanted. Lastly, I have a very odd obsession with Japanese stuff and people, Mulan (I know she’s not Japanese but I still like her), and books with one word titles(i.e. crack burned, crooked, flipped, shug, flushed, twisted, speak. I do things sometimes and forget people are watching. Sometimes I make weird faces at ppl when they call me and don’t say anything. Im forgetful and without my student planner id have an F in all my classes. and I am so disorganized that the school accidentally made me a most organized award and my writing teacher hung it up on her wall to make her laugh.

names

Names
My full name is Kathryn Patricia Douglas. Kathryn meaning purity is the name of my grandma. She was Kathryn Galaway, then Kathryn Elder. In a way I am a bit like Esparanza having the same name as my grandma. Unfortunately she died when I was young and couldn’t remember. She has epilepsy. I was almost Maddie my other grandmas name but she died from cancer when my dad was 9 so he didn’t want to give me such a depressing name. Also my mom’s name means the same thing as mine. Purity. My middle name Patricia is my aunt’s first name and my mom’s youngest sister.

My last name is Douglas; it’s from my dad’s side of course. It’s a Scottish last name and somehow there are these two Douglass in Scottish history. The black Douglas (no pun intended) and the red Douglas. I guess this infers that I have some Scottish in me from somewhere.

My most common nickname is Kathy. I have been called this since the 5th grade but I regretted it. In the 5th grade I made a lot of new friends and all of them knew me as Kathy. I tried to get rid of it coming to California but I gave in. I was like ugh what the hell...fine.
My other nick names are Kat, Kath, Athy, kitty, kitkat, patty, or Marce (which shouldn’t be part of my name at all). Kat is usually what my “buddies” who thing that I don’t seem like a Kathy call me, I prefer to be called Kat but Kathy sticks like glue. Kath is what a person who is really close to me will call me, if there was such a thing as intimacy in my life, the intimate person would most likely call me Kath. It’s like a cutesy name for me. Athy is a teasing nickname and only guys who really want to get on my nerves call me athy. Kitty and kitkat are family names. My cousins have been calling me kitty since before I can remember and its kind of annoying since I have grown up and they still call me kitty. Patty is a nickname for Patricia which is what my sister calls me. In return I call her patrivita because that’s her middle name. She hates it. Lastly a lot more people on my mom’s side of the family call me Marce because my sister and I sound/look similar and that is my sister’s name. Plus most of them are too old to remember my name is Kathryn.

cisnero's view on sexism in mango street

The author of house on Mango Street clearly has some sexism topics in the book. the author seems to believe that girls are treated more harshly than men. The girls in her book suffer from being confined to stereotypes, men, and their homes. This is a sign that she believes that they suffer from sexism and confinement. The way this book is written sexism is a main conflict as many of the women face it and have to endure it. Sadly the world is not the kindest to people who go against the standards in their environment. In the reading “sally” it is a about a girl who’s father believes she is too attractive and confines “her father says to be this beautiful is trouble,” pg 81. In opposition we could infer that if he had a son, most fathers allow their boys to be more creative. But sally had a strict father who also hit her. Soon her father starts to beat her as if he forgot that she is a girl and his daughter as well. This is sad for sally because most girls who are raised with a father in a bad community look up to them but this little girl fears him.

Also in this book I happen to notice that there really aren’t many happy women. They all have too many kids, are beaten, or aren’t too educated. “Next week she comes over black and blue and she ask what can I do” (pg85 Minerva who writes poems). This quote is about a woman beaten by her no good husband. in the book Esparanza fears and doesn’t was the life in bondage that other women around mango street have. Therefore she starts to dream of being the woman who runs her own life. Even after that her mom advises her to work hard and be someone. I think these are all signs of the author hinting at how one of the morals in this story is to not get caught up in the present of boy girl expectations, but go your own way.

Er(n)ythin

My n looked like an r, so they laughed at me. Truth is I was never the best speller, nor the most self controlled. Then my best friend Lex, wasn’t my best friend anymore either. We got into an argument cuz she thought I’d be a good idea to make me jealous of her, but it didn’t turn out too well. They made fun of me, really made me feel like nothing.
I ran away, cried, tripped and then the anger in my small stomach slid up my throat and came out as loud screaming and swearing. Lex, her cousin, and friend laughed. They laughed until they cried, and I stood there in my long frilly socks and stupid sundress. I handed her cousin a note and then I said “don’t ever come back to my house”. But she had something to say to me and stuck her foot in the door before I could slam it. “We don’t want to come over your house anyway. You’re a loser.”
At school the next morning, I got on the bus to hell. Lex and her cousin were there looking at the note I gave. When they say me the two and their group (that I was no longer a part of), moved to around where I sat, and simultaneously chanted. “YOU DON’T MEAN E-R-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G, ERNYTHAAAANG” I didn’t know what they were talking about at all until they through the note I had sloppily written at my face. I read it, and I felt stupid. Stupider than stupid. It said “you don’t mean er(n)ything” but then n wasn’t completed so it looked like an R.

Blappity-Blap-Blah..SMACK.

I stood at the bus stop with all of the other girls and boys, watching my “best friend” talk to them. they blapped on about some girl and her chest, they said she stuffed it.I Never talked to them myself, because they’d never talk to me,i was a "loser". I looked back and forth at their big mouths hanging open, and happen to notice a hair that poked out at the top of her head. I figured it must be really embarrassing to talk about someone else's appearance when hers was crooked too, I so I picked it up and moved it. As soon as I touched it Lex slapped me right in the face. I felt like I had been hit by a bus. But worse than the slap I feared for the blappity-blaps that float around in the school air, more fluidly than oxygen itself.
We got on the bus and I heard them saying things about me. I cried, and my cheeks stung from the cold, one more than the other because of the slap. Soon after we got to school word spread. I got lots of “Dude, why did you pull her hair?!?!” , but I never did. I never would pull anyones hair,especially not hers. When I walked from P.E. to math class, people glared, others giggles and whispered, and the rest of the lot spread the rumors. The rumor that I, kathryn douglas, pulled her best friends hair out and got punched in the face.
Hell, Im sure they believed it. My face was hot, anger hot. And finally at lunch,she walked up to me and asked “so are you going to apologize”. I thought long and hard about it. My only friend, since the 2nd grade. “im sorry” I said. With my head lowered and my dignity gone I could have cried until my eyes fell out, but this was the beginning of a frozen heart. My face was straight and my heart was slowly but surely icing over. Turning out anyone who dared to treat me like I was in their way. Id rather leave, and die..

windows

Being outside is often taken for granted, we sit inside and get on our computers for a long time or read a book, even. In the house on Mango Street, the women in the readings are all confound by windows, boundaries. Window is somewhat of a tease, only a lick of the taste. The view from a window has no good feelings, even if the view is breath taking its only part of it.
Looking out the window being depressed is sad because sitting inside and never allow to be outside just because you’re beautiful is torture. it’s like being given a cake and being told you can’t eat it, sadly each one of these women were taken away from the thing that they valued most. And while not all things have the same meaning a window is just a sad substitute for outside.
One woman is taken away from her opportunity to enjoy her life. To do what she desired was a very important thing to her as. But then up came a man and took her away from it, and of course she was powerless to do anything to fight it. Another lady is enclosed in social windows by not speaking English, she doesn’t wasn’t to give up her origins, she doesn’t want to be a traitor. So she refuses to say anything in English.
These are just examples of women who are alone, depressed and feel as though they have no outlet. I can relate, I love to take pictures of nature but I’ve always ridden in a car so there was no way to take a great picture. I used to have to watch the kids play outside though my window while my childhood drifted away, I didn’t have very many friends and sadly no one really wanted to be my friend. So I sat there looking out the window, unsure whether I should go out into the bare coolness of a shallow friendship that has no real important. Or watch what it looks like to grow up being friends with only one person. Today I still look outside the car window, but I have my own camera to capture what I wish I could just step out of the car to see.
These women never had the chances I did, which is sad and tragic. And even though they are but mere fictional characters they are based on real ones who had real experiences like that.

Celie's bruises,Sophia's beaten face, Flowers in the field; It is The Color Purple...

An epistolary Drama novel The Color Purple by Alice Walker explores many topics such as points of gender inequality, mistreatment or woman, and how certain events can affect the rest of someone’s life. The novel starts with two sisters, Nettie and Celie, desperately in need of escaping their abusive home life. However the two sister’s spirits and thinking are very different, and because of that they end up being opposites in fortune and life in general. Nettie and Celie have three major differences between them: the way Celie lives was more like a man than Nettie, in terms of working; she does a lot of hard labor. Celie also has to deal with abuse. Nettie has more opportunities than Celie, who suffered a lot of misfortune.

Nettie could not handle the work that Celie does, based on what she thinks is tiring. Every day, Celie cleans, cooks, sews, and caters to Albert’s household needs. She is like the house maid; she suffers from him beating her, but often acts like nothing even happened. She works in the fields more than Albert ever does. She does everything in the house; it was more like she wears the pants in the house literally. Nettie also works hard as a missionary, building homes and schools. Yet she does it on her own free will. She is not forced to do anything while she is there; being a hard worker is much harder to do when it is forced.

“No matter how down I maybe and sometimes I get very down indeed, a hug from Olivia or Adam completely restores me to the level of functioning.”pg164

Nettie wouldn’t have had the long term resistance to being mistreated like Celie, she would die. Celie became immune to the beatings and sexual abuse from an earlier age which is the reason that she is able to put up with it. However Nettie was treated correctly and never has much to do except to do well in school and then is protected the rest of her life. That shield makes her incapable of surviving on such terms as Celie does. The fact that Nettie feels down from just being tired, when Celie is tired, unhappy, worked to death, and sexually abused, is proof that she probably wouldn’t be able to handle it. If Nettie even knew what Celie went through, she would have tried to escape with Celie.

Celie was also often abused, but Nettie never had the same experience as Celie. Celie is always obedient and never does Albert wrong, but he beats her for just being herself and not Shug, Albert’s past lover. He wants Shug, and he cannot have her. She has to deal with mistreatment for all those years, when Nettie was never really hit.

“He beat me when you not here, I say. Who do, she say, Albert? Mr._____, I say. I can’t believe it, she say…what he beat you for? She ast. For being me and not you.”pg75

Coping with being beaten for no reason is a big deal. Nettie was only hit with rocks by Albert in the book, Being protected by Celie when they lived at home and being safe with the preacher and his wife, she is save. She is never abused sexually and only teased. Nettie even goes as far as running away to escape her father. Celie only had to protect Nettie. Celie is trapped but only to protect her dearest, and only younger sister Nettie.

Nettie has a lot more freedoms than Celie did; she is able to express her feelings too. She goes to Africa, raises children she loves and falls in love and gets married. Celie on the other marries because Nettie cannot, rarely went anywhere, and never gets to marry who she loves. In the beginning of the book Celie is raped by her father, who automatically decides her fate. She is all alone and in the beginning her father said to her. Then even when she was marries it was arranged and she hates him and his kids. “Better not tell nobody but god it’d kill your mama.” (pg1)Most rape victims are afraid to tell, but Celie never has the choice to tell or not to tell. She also is not loved by the person she married. He loves his ex-fiancé Shug and so does Celie, but Celie and Shug cannot be together and that often disappoints Celie. Nettie is given a large amount of opportunities that Celie does not get because she was impregnated by her father. She cannot go to school, date, and after her father does bad things to her, she cannot have any children willingly. However Nettie is able to secretly date, moves on to go to Africa, after learning new languages and going to school. Then when she met the person she loves she is allowed to marry him and even have children if she wants to. This shows that Nettie is given an ample amount of opportunities but Celie is robbed of her virginity, willingness to love, children, sister, and life. She does not get to achieve as much as she wants to until she escapes.

As we’ve seen, Celie and Nettie differ in their work, family, and worldly experience. While Celie’s confinement and abuse keep her depressed and down until the end of the novel, Nettie’s travels and exposure to other cultures allow her to be happy throughout the book. Through the contrasts between these sisters, Walker shows us that in life the steps that you take, affected by others, can forever seal your fate. Celie was lucky to have had Shug, it allows her a way to leave her sad life and start fresh. Nettie is given opportunities in life that any woman in that day would be lucky to have. Overall the novel was a very symbolic and touching story that inspired the world of women writers.

FFFFFUUUU >:[ late debate rebuttal. -yells-

Sam’s opening response is very agreeable, in his debate he argues that

“…the best first step that can be taken against terrorism is to create an understanding between the United States Government and nonviolent Muslims.”

In America now there is a lot of racism toward people who are Arabian or middle eastern. Also there is way more anti-Islam encouragement and so he states,

Americans made many enemies when they denied the building of the harmless structure. Until we can accept something like this, we will not improve relations with the nonviolent Muslims,

On sam’s debate at first I thought his second topic about how America likes to change other countries was a little off topic from the opening statement. However after reading the paragraph after that I saw how he tied the ideas together. I thought maybe it would have helped if he would have made a separate paragraph about being tolerant and accepting.
Overall it was a good writing and it had lots of strong points. The only thing that I saw that could be fixed is the over use of the word we.
We can build shelters for refugees outside of their borders.

We can reform U.S. immigration laws, but what we can’t do is change those countries government and philosophy. We attempted to do end communism in Korea, and failed. We attempted to do the same, in Vietnam, and failed. We for a while have been trying to change the Chinese treatment of its workforce, but they are not showing any major signs of changing.

Also he didn’t describe and elaborate on the racism, and anti-islam issues.
The quote and the whole essay seems to have been very accurate and I don’t doubt that this is a major problem in America. However my opinion is that terrorism doesn’t just happen, someone did something to somebody to piss them off. So how can we blame the terrorist for being mad and radical when America is acting like a bully, Pushing around other countries, which sam pointed out, never works.

We can build shelters for refugees outside of their borders. We can reform U.S. immigration laws, but what we can’t do is change those countries government and philosophy. We attempted to do end communism in Korea, and failed. We attempted to do the same, in Vietnam, and failed. We for a while have been trying to change the Chinese treatment of its workforce, but they are not showing any major signs of changing.

Also the government cannot be trusted to inform the people. Now in the modern age even America’s government hides their cruel actions, deceive its own citizens.

terrorist and protection. the preperation steps: pt 1

Terrorist are a threat to all nations in any place. On September 11th 2001 a terrorist attack on the United States of America occurred. Things changed new suspicions of trusting government occurred and terrorist watched it happen or died in the action.

To protect our nation from terrorist attacks there are 3 main things we need: a good leader, a safe government, and loyal citizens.

The 2000 election was a complete disaster, George bush won over al gore and no one knew what was going on. The election had seemed to be rigged. The problem is that their shouldn’t be any controversial topics when it comes to knowing who the leader of a country is. The president of the United States should be who we vote for. If the people make up the nation then why shouldn’t the people have the fair right to vote? If the elections where going to be dirty why bother voting at all.

The government is very shady as well. The rich don’t pay taxes, the greedy get the money. My question WHY? There is no answer because the government needs to keep their dirty little secrets under the rug. I’m a firm believer in sharing information with the people because when things interrupt the lives of people with the greed of some white guy.

It’s essential as well for the citizens to cooperate with the law in order to “form a more perfect union”. The people protest but gang violence, and street fights are just what we don’t need any more of. Every time you turn on the news it’s “girl died” “mom killed” “son shot”. People need to practice some control over their streets. Littering, being loud, and causing trouble. It needs to stop.

This relates because the first step to preventing terrorist is a unified nation that is well organized. Once we solve our problems we can handle the terrorist in a way that can be useful. When the people trust the government and support the cause of every day needs, when the government can be trusted, and when the leader is someone the people the government and the foreign countries can be trusted. THEN THE NATION can fight of the nasty terrorist germ.

stealing reponse to bassam lulzy

Okay so this is my response to bassam’s post. It’s about stealing.
My idea on stealing is:

WHY: people usually steal because they don’t have the money, some do it for the rush, and some do it to rebellious or help others even.

Problem: the problem with that is stealing is like a double edged sword you lose and gain some. I think it really sucks if you don’t have enough money to buy food and steal. My brother is homeless, not that I am proud but I love him and he got arrested for stealing. He got caught and went to jail for a few days. But he deserved it because wrong is wrong.

People who steal for kicks get their ass kick. Why steal when you are RICH. That is taking for granted everything that people do for money, and all the poor people who don’t steal. It’s tragic that people think it’s funny. Those types of things are horrible deeds and should not go unnoticed. The problem though is that rich people who steal usually know what they are doing and if they get caught they get a slap on the wrist because daddy has bride money. But in the end that hurts them and the government because their kids grow up to be liars thieves’ druggies and cheaters. I’m sure if you cheat at Harvard you would get kick out the of the class at least. And that’s what’s wrong with our government today. They steal from middle class when WE DON’T HAVE ALL THE MONEY. I don’t see rich people working hard to pay taxes and STILL have dinner on Christmas and maybe a pair of shoes for the kids. Yet their kids are stealing.

Rebellious kids usually get traits from traumatic memories. I can see that someone who never had anything might steal because they want something. But when it’s a matter of wanting something I think that even the poor kids who get banged up in gangs and stuff like that are able to get out one way and get help another. Unfortunately some gangs who steal and do other things like that usually won’t let that person get away without putting a bullet in his (excuse my French) ass.
SO JUST DON’T STEAL, OR JOIN GANGS!!

what you do vs. where you go. and merit and race . best and worse

for the weakest, as the class agreed it was merit and race. i had alot of issues with it, but the main one was it encouraged giving in to societies expectation of low acceptance. i speak this way in the mind set that when i go to college that i will not have any problem getting in because I am African American. My standards are already high because I know my competition. And I go up and above, or try because I want to be an exceptional student and I want to be successful in life.

People have this sort of mind set that no one ever includes them in things but when It comes to this sort of thing they just give up. Its shameful because the things that are worth fighting for in “minorities” isn’t gangs drugs or money. Its education. “the mind is a terrible thing to waste” was the UNCF’s campaign slogan and yet people still waste there minds on stupid things.
However ”where you go vs. what you do”( Martha O’Conell ) is a very legitimate article. As I stated in a class discussion if I wanted to be a pilot why would I go to Harvard? The fact is the way people see you may be different by the college you went to but your job is much more important. I’m sure a mechanic shop wants you to know cars, not … e =mc2.

I do how ever wish that people didn’t care what college you go to though because the way I see it is that it shouldn’t matter as long as you studied the right field. Some people are racist and some people aren’t and that’s just the way it is. If a minority isn’t accepted into a college because of their race then that’s a problem for the schools because soon other countries will catch and surpass America. Only because it is un reasonable to not accept a citizen into a college because of their race. Again I don’t actually see myself as the one to have issues getting into college and I am confident that if I work together with others like me, we could perhaps protest or try to change colleges of America for the better.

looks, doing things, changing. ~ why not be yourself

DON’T WANT: Personally I wouldn’t really change anything about myself. No matter how much I complain, I love myself. I wouldn’t trade any part of my face to be prettier, or my body to be sexy or anything like that. Not in a conceited way but nothing is better for me than being me ; In my own skin. No ones pimples are like mine and no one has hair just like mine either. Im not being self absorbed again, I just believe that im fine the way I am, even if it is my natural tendency to down on myself. If I felt I wanted to change myself I wouldn’t depend on anyone else but myself either.

DON’T NEED: I wouldn’t go get tattoos, perms, contacts (unless it’s a joke or costume). I also don’t want people changing me. Im not going to let a robot wipe my ass and feed me then extract the fat from my body and dispose of it. That’s not necessary. I can feed myself; I’ve been wiping my own ass since I was 1 and a half years old. I don’t want a maid and I definitely don’t want other people making my cup of noodles. ~I wouldn’t upgrade my body parts either. If I wanted to be taller then I’d eat a lot of proteins and pray to grow taller. If I wanted to be skinnier id work out. I’m not going to use foundation because I don’t want gook on my face when acne eventually goes away.

PROPS TO: People with prosthetic body parts are cool because they found themselves a way to not be glued to a wheelchair; I admire them for the brains behind their invention and use of prosthetics. However I would rather work out any day them take the easy way out with liposuction or something dumb like that. There is always a way to be different without being fake or taking the easy way out.

DICUSSING: I talked with Kasia about this. Beauty is within, pretty is on the outside. There is always more to a person than looks. Sometimes it may be hard to find something to like about a person but you should challenge yourself. Find something in every person you meet!